Happy Holidays

We had a very nice Christmas here at "The McDougall" home. Most of my family was here to share a nice day and a very nice dinner. The best part was just being together. I am just sorry the rest of the family could not be here. My brother and nephew did come over on Christmas Eve for a visit. I just want to Thank God for giving us another year together.

Today my poor husband is sick. I think he has food poisoning from eating raw oysters or just maybe he ate too much junk, anyway he has been in bed all day what time he is not in the bathroom. No one else is ill thank goodness.

Bobby is washing clothes. Tiger and family have gone home. Mac is in bed and I am just messing around.

Happy Holidays to all.

IF I COULD SAVE TIME IN A BOTTLE

WHAT A BEAUTIFUL SONG. I heard this song early this morning and it really says what is in my heart. Have you told your family how much they mean to you. I hope I have.
There is no one more precious to me than my boys, this includes Mac, Tiger, Bobby, Charles, and Butch. Each of you are a big part of my heart. I love each of you so very much.Charlene has been more than a daughter-in-law to me, she has been friend and also someone to talk to and I love her as a daughter and cherish all our times together. Sharon, Jason, and Crystal have all been very special in my life and I love each of them. My co-workers have been there for me, cried with me, prayed with me, laughed with me and made me feel like I am appreciated. I love each of them for their huge hearts and for all the hours of fun and work we have shared. Helen, Maury, Steve, Carolyn, and Vickie have been a huge part of my life for a very long time and I love each of them. TELL YOUR FAMILY HOW MUCH YOU LOVE THEM, CALL THEM, SPEND AS MUCH TIME WITH THEM AS POSSIBLE, BE THERE IF THEY NEED YOU. DON'T PUT IT OFF UNTIL TOMORROW. TOMORROW MAYBE TOO LATE. CHERISH YOUR TIME TOGETHER. I LOVE YOU ALL.

Next Tuesday is Christmas. My first one without my Mom. I miss her so much and I hope she is healthy and happy and having fun in Heaven. I cry and feel sorry for myself because now I am an orphan but life does go on and I know she would want me to be happy. Most of my family will be here for us to share our new tradition of steak and baked potatoes for dinner. Can't wait to see everyone.

Will Santa be good to me? I hope so because I have been a pretty good girl this year.

Everyone keep the prayers going for me because I need all the help I can get.

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL AND A VERY HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

Life

A year ago today my journey began. It was a very difficult year, full of fear, what was happening to me? Would I survive? Can I do what I need to do to live? Will my family and friends still love the new me? Will cancer take over my life? I still don't have all the answers but I am here and I am still fighting the battle. The chemo left me with some side effects. I have neuropathy in both feet and I still don't have much hair. The radiation gave me second degree burns but they have healed.
The Femara which I will take for (5) years is rough. I have muscle, joint, and bone ache and pain. I find it hard to use my left hand because it hurts so bad. I have swelling in my left leg but I am still here. Am I sad? Yes, because it has been hard but they learn more each day about cancer and I hope there is a cure soon.

LIFE.... A journey with different pathways that lead to the place we are meant to be.
The road was long, the journey was difficult... but I did it!!!

While all this was going on I was dealing with how to help my Mother who had lung cancer. Could I be strong enough for both of us, how could I help her, what should I do? She lost her battle to cancer in January. I just hope and pray she knew how much I loved her and how much I miss her. Her room is still as she left it, all I gave away were her clothes for a garage sale to raise money for cancer research. Life does go on with all the ups and downs.

To all my friends and family Thank You so much for the support, love, and caring.
My life is better because you are all in it. I love all of you.

God Bless...stay strong...take care...

O U C H

Well let me tell you that 2nd degree radiation burns really hurt. I have burns under my left arm, lt chest, and lt upper neck. The ones under my arm and left chest hurt the worst because of tha fat rolls so there is always friction in these areas. I am using a special burn cream and it is helping it will just take a long time to heal due to the areas where they are. Thank God I only have two more treatments and the radiation therapy will be over. It has been a long journey but hopefully it will be over soon. God has been good to me and my family and friends have been supportive.
Life goes on.

Not much else happening in my neck of the woods. Don't see much of the family anymore, everyone is busy with their lives and it has been so hot we all just want to rest when we can. I don't have much energy so I just stay home and rest. My hubby usually takes me shopping because I can't seem to get up the energy to go alone, he has been a big help over this last year with my health problems.

The girls at work take me out to dinner once in a while and are very good to me.
My friends at work have been so very good to me.

Love and health to all.

HOT AS HADES

It is hot, hot, HOT. When you walk outside it feels like you are walking into an oven set at 400 degrees. It is so hot that you just want to stay inside with the nice cool a/c blowing on you.

Did a little shopping this weekend at the Big K and of course Publix. Not a lot of good sales but just needed to get out of the house for a short while. Stopped at Steak & Shake and had a burger and fries for lunch. We also had Gabriel subs for dinner because I hate to cook on week ends. However I did make Sloppy Joes for Sunday lunch.

So far I have had (14) radiation treatments and I have (19) more to go. I see Dr. Shah tomorrow and she will tell me about the chemo pill I will be taking for the next (5) years. There is so much they know about cancer and there is still so much to learn, things change everyday so you just have to trust your doctors and hope for the best.

My Mother-In-Law has been in the hospital since Tuesday night. She is doing better but she has a condition called "CHF" Congestive Heart Failure and there is no cure for it. She just needs to take her meds especially the diuretics to help her get rid of fluid retention.

Hope everyone had a wondeful week end. Keep me in your prayers.
Love to all.

Life Goes On

So far I have received 6 out of 33 radiation treatments. They are done every day of the week except Saturday and Sunday. The treatments take about 15-20 minutes, the hard part is the positioning which has to be exact for every treatment. The ladies that work in the department are all very nice.

Not much going on here just a lot of rain. It has been real hot and the humidity is awful as usual.

Take care one and all.

Vacation

I finally got a week off from the chemo and all the doctor visits so Bobby and I went on vacation for a few days. We went down to Indialantic to visit Tiger and family. We had a very nice time, went out to lunch, went swimming, relaxed and I slept a lot. We came home on Wednesday and just relaxed for the rest of the week before Bobby had to leave for home on Sunday morning. Christy, John and the kids came over on Friday afternoon for a visit and Bobby went out to dinner with them.
Angie came over Saturday afternoon and it was so good to see her again, she and Bobby went out that night for dinner and a little shopping.

Came back to work on Monday. Today I see the radiation oncologist to get set up for my radiation therapy. I have to have 33 treatments so this starts another part of my cancer treatment.

Bobby has been sick since he got home so I hope he feels better real soon and can start having fun again.

Love and kisses to all. Keep praying for me.

Taxol # 12

The week started out on a good note. I went out to dinner with (7) of my friends Monday night to Buca De Beppo. Dinner was very good and we all enjoyed ourselves.
The antipasta was wonderful.

Tuesday I went to work as usual and the day seemed to take forever. I know it was a long day because I was anxious to have my last chemo treatment. Finally the time arrived and I got my last treatment, I finished about 1530 and (6) of my friends were there to see me ring the bell. Betty has been with me for all of my treatments except for two, she has taken me home when I could not drive and called to check on me and just been a true friend. My friends that were with me when I rang the bell were: Betty, Joanne, Brenda, Donna, Jackie, and Kathy. All my co workers have been very supportive and helpful during my treatment. Next I start my radiation, I will keep you posted.

Have a great day and God Bless all.
Keep praying!!!

Taxol #11

Eleven down one to go. The end is nearly here for the chemo and I thank God for all his help to get me through this treatment. It has been the hardest thing I have ever had to do. You feel so tired you just want to stay in bed all the time. The treatment it self is not bad, it's just the after effects. I have lost several toenails, all my hair, gotten brown pigmentation on my neck, dry skin but I have survived all that. I have my last treatment next Tuesday and my friend Betty has been with me all the way, she has only missed two treatments, she is certainly a gift from God. I feel better today than I have for a while.

Went to see Dancing With The Stars Monday night with two of my friends. We had a really good time. We were in nosebleed section and I really had to push myself to get up all those stairs to row P, what a hike that was but I made it. We saw Joey Lawrence, Joey McIntire, Joey Fatone, and Drew Lachey and they were all really good.
They also did some singing and they were really good as a quartet singing 50"s songs.
The dancing was really good and they all did their free style from the shows. The pros were excellent as well, Louie, Alex, Kim and the one who won with Apolo but I can not remember her name. They also had other dancers there.

My Bobby came in early this morning from NYC. It is so good to have him home for 2 1/2 weeks. I'm sure we will have some fun while he is here. I just have to remember to pace myself and not over do.

More news later, love to all. Keep praying for me.

Taxol # 10

Ten down and two to go. Yesterday went very well. They started me late but that happens sometimes in a hospital setting. I finished my treatment about 1530 and got home around 1600. The treatment sometimes makes me very tired so I went to bed about 1930. Slept very well. The nurse I had yesterday was not as on the ball as most of the nurses I have had so far but she was very nice.

Took Tuesday off because we had a very low census at work and I just lazed around all day. All I did was wash a load of clothes and cook a ham, so as you can see I had a real hard day.

Next week Bobby is coming home for 2 1/2 weeks and I am really excited about doing some things with him. It will be fun. I have to remember to pace myself and not do too much.

Hope all of you are having a great week, lots of love to all.
Keep me in your prayers.

Taxol # 9

Well I had my 9th treatment and I was home by 3:15 P.M. The treatments are not hard, they just take time for the fluids to run into my port and then I get to drive home.
The highlight of the day is we get a fresh baked cookie at 2:00 P.M. each Wednesday when I have my treatment. The nicest volunteer (Jenny) makes the cookies and brings them around, she also hangs around and we talk about shopping and fun things. I felt really good yesterday, today is not as good.

Have you been watching Army Wives and The Starter Wife, these shows are pretty good.
Just wonder how true they are to real life. I cannot imagine one of my sons hitting me, I think I would put a stop to that somehow, maybe a 2x4 against the head to get their attention. Life is strange and things do happen but I am not a door mat for anyone. I have also started watching Are You Smarter Than A 5th Grader and let me tell you I AM NOT. It is amazing what I have forgot that I learned in school all those years ago.

No plans this week end except to take my husband out for Father's Day.
Hope you all have a great week end.
Keep up the prayers for my recovery.
Love to all.

Taxol # 8

Eight down four to go. Can I do it? I sure hope so. The days get longer and the energy gets lower and lower. I am trying to keep up with life but it sure is hard. I have never been so tired in my entire life. I just keep praying for strenghth.

Picked up the kids from the airport on Thursday. They had a super trip and they all had great tans to show for their trip to Hawaii. They left Friday morning for home.

I broke my toe Thursday night. It hurts a lot. I am working but wish I was home with it propped up.

Had a very boring week end, did not do anything.

Taxol # 6 and # 7

Things are looking better. I only have 5 more treatments of chemo and then I start my radiation for 33 treatments. If things don't change I will be finished in September. It has been a long road and I have not felt real good, the main problem being extremely tired all the time but I have felt better yesterday and today than I have in a very long time. Prayer has helped me more than I can say, I am not a deeply religious person but God has been there for me and he has answered many of my prayers over the years and he is helping me now to deal with this crisis in my life. My point being is pray everyday and believe in God.

I spent a very lazy weekend. All I did was a little shopping. Bought a new washer and dryer on Saturday, picked up my computer from Best Buy, got a new monitor and now my mouse does not work, oh well I hope to go shopping this weekend and get a mouse. Had dinner at Houlihan's Saturday evening, it was ok. Spent all day Sunday at home.

Monday went to grocery store and bought a beautiful sirloin and some short ribs and Mac cooked them on the grill Monday afternoon and they turned out delicious. We had the same for dinner on Tuesday because there was so much left and I even had more left which I froze for my next batch of vegetable beef soup.

Talked to Charlene and Charles on Sunday and they are having a good time in Hawaii. My son was sleeping when I called. Talked to Bobby and he stays so busy all the time but he seems to love his life so I am very happy for him. Hopefully next year we can go on some more trips and I hope to make my trip to NYC again real soon.

Peace, joy, and love to all. Keep praying for me.

Annette

TAXOL # 5

Well I saw Dr. Buchholz on Monday the 14th and found out I need to have 33 treatments of radiation to complete my cancer treatment. I will get my simulation on July 18th to make sure they target the right area.

Got tickets to go see DWTS on June 25th with some friends. Can't wait to see the dancing and all that jive.

Roadrunner tech came today (14th) could not fix computer. Took back to Best Buy on Saturday and they could not get the computer or the monitor to work, sent back for repair.

Had chemo on Wednesday (16th), things went fine, got home around 4 p.m.

Only worked 4 hours on Friday. I was just exhausted and not much help to my co-workers. Slept until 1:30p.m.

Rested all day Saturday until 5:30 then went to dinner and took computer to Best Buy. Lazy Sunday to grocery store at 7 a.m. then relaxed rest of day.

Last week end had company. Tiger and Charles spent Saturday night here and we took Vickie out for Mother's Day. Butch, Crystal and the (3) Jason's came over for the evening on Saturday and we spent the time talking. It was a very nice family evening. Tiger and Charles went home after Carroll and Charlene picked them up. A nice time was had by all.

Excuse the rambling. Love to all.

Taxol # 4

Four down eight to go. Things are going better with the treatment. I went to ber at 6:30 P.M. last night, it wipes me out that first day and then I do pretty good.
Have to go see a Radiology Oncology Doctor on Monday for a consult since the protocol has changed so much in the last six months. I'll do whatever they decide just to make sure all the cancer is gone.

I was really upset that Joey was in the bottom (2) on DWTS, Ian did much worse than him but the American public must love Ian more. I knew La Kisha would be going home last night on AI, Blake should go next and Jordin should win. She is amazing for a 17 year old.

Still waiting to hear about my land inheritance in SC, guess things move really slow up there. Maybe I'll build a place up there and move. Yea, like Mac would do that.

Not much else going on right now, will update next week after seeing Doctor.

Chemo # 3 For Taxol

Well I had my 3rd treatment yesterday and it went well. My blood count has dropped to 9.9 so I will probably need a transfusion in a couple of more weeks. I see my doctor next Wednesday and I have another treatment next Wednesday. I took a nap when I got home and woke up when I heard my husband unlocking the front door. He brought Gabriel subs home for dinner. They were super delicious. My side effects usually start on Friday but this week I am not going to have any.

I watched American Idol and the 2 guys who went home were the ones I predicted.
Next week the 4 remaining better step up their game plans because they are all good.
Make sure you watch Grey's Anatomy tonight it is a 2 hour special.

My super sweet son called last night and we had a 3 way conversation with Mac, me, and him. He wanted to make sure my treatment went ok. It was almost like he was there with us, just yakking about things.

I almost had a serious heart attack on Tuesday. I got home from work and could not find our dog Zoe. I looked in all the rooms and outside twice, could not find her anywhere. I was going to call Mac to see if something had happened to her and I decided I should call Terry first to see if she had seen her when she cleaned house, when about that time I heard snoring. I looked where the sound was coming from and sure enough she was behind the big brown chair snoozing away, she has never gone behind that chair to sleep. I called Mac to let him know that he almost had to take me to the ER and he laughed when I told him. I guess I am more attached to her than I thought.

Tried to cook meatballs to bring for a luncheon today but I burned them. I followed the directions on the package but my oven must be set higher than the 350 degrees I set it on. Guess I will have to call Sears and get it checked, (under warranty).

I hope each and everyone of you will have a super day and specail love to all.

April 25th chemo

Well I had my second treatment of Taxol last Wednesday. My blood count dropped to 10.5 from 11.4 which is not bad but I just hope it does not drop lower. My nurse today was Kristin and she was very nice. She told me some things I did not know. With the Taxol if you are going to get sick it is usually the 3rd day which has happened to me twice. She told me to start taking my Compazine every 6 hours for three days and it really did work. I only had slight bone pain in my left leg, so things went better this time. Today I will have my 3rd treatment.

Mac and I went to Indialantic last Friday and stayed until Sunday night. It was a very relaxing weekend. Mac, Tiger, and Charles went fishing Saturday and Sunday. They caught some fish. Check out the blogs for Bobby and Charlene for pictures.
Friday we went to Texas Roadhouse for lunch and it was delicious. Tiger grilled pork chops outside and I fixed the other stuff for dinner Friday night. On Saturday we had a low country boil with oysters, shrimp, kielbasa, corn, and saltines.We also had chips with salsa for snacking.

Sunday was the big day for Charles. We went to Andretti Thrill Park for his birthday and there were 10-12 of his friends there to celebrate. They had pizza, cold drinks, and a ice cream cake. The pizza was really good. HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHARLES!!!!! What fun we had.

Monday I rested and got caught up on all my programs. Back to work on Tuesday. No rest for the weary (haha).

Will blog more after my chemo today. Have a super day and week.

More Chemo

Good news, my hemoglobin is 11.4, that is great news. I was very nervous and scared on Wednesday the 18th when I had my first treatment of Taxol. Afraid of the unknown, how will this medicine effect me? Will I be ok? The good news is that I had no reaction to the treatment. Betty came and stayed with me and brought me home. However I was very tired and went to bed at 7:00 P.M.

On Thursday I had a mild reaction, everyone kept asking why my neck was so red so I took a look and not only was my neck red but so was my face and my chest area. It looked like a bad sunburn without blisters. I was very tired today but that got better in the afternoon.

At 1:40 A.M. Friday I woke up with reflux. Went to work and the nausea started about 5:00 A.M. I took my compazine and it did not work. Dr. G
gave me a prescription for zifran and that seemed to work. I was able to eat lunch with no problem. In the afternoon I developed bone pain in my legs and hips. Could not get comfortable no matter what I did. Then along came the numbness and tingling in the toes and I also lost the toenail on the big toe of my left foot. What a day !!!!

Saturday started with the same pain in lower body. This chemo is not as easy on me as the last regimen. Went to GNC and picked up some glusamine and vitamin b 6. This is going to help with the side effects. This is my life for the last few days. Now you may wonder how I feel and let me tell you not great but so very happy to be alive and to know that I am going to be cancer free because of all the things I am having to do at this time in my life.

I thank God for all my family and good friends. I have so much to be thankful for and each day is better because of these wonderful people in my life.

Keep me in your prayers and love to all.

Vacation

Bobby came for a short visit. It sure was nice to have him home. This is a short version of our visit. He arrived last Tuesday and we just spent some time together and I worked Wednesday. He helped me close out some bank accounts that Mom had. On Thursday we went to Indialantic to visit my other son and his family. Went to lunch, picked up Charles from school, went to grocery store, Tiger cooked out, had dinner. Friday, the guys and I went shopping, ate at Roadhouse Grill, went home. Had Bizarro pizza for dinner and went to coldstone creamery for ice cream. Saturday went to Red Lobster for lunch, bought lap top from Circuit City, went to Dick's sporting goods and bought Gator shirts and cap. Carroll visited Friday afternoon and we had a nice catch up chat. Came home on Sunday, stopped by Wendy's and picked up lunch. Spent rest of day resting. On Monday picked up CD back up of my broken computer from Best Buy, stopped by Macy's to pick up some shirts for Bobby, went to Gabriel's and got subs for lunch.
Came home ate lunch, watched TV, washed clothes,etc. Crystal stopped by to see us. Took Bobby to airport. Now I am just relaxing.
Going to have more lab work this week. My hemoglobin is down to 8.4 and I may need a blood transfusion if it does not go up. Going back to work tomorrow but I wish I could stay home. I just stay so tired all the time. I have dizzy spells every day and I have shortness of breath when I do the least little thing. Keep up the good wishes and prayers.
Love to all. I miss my Bobby all ready.

Chemo # 4

Well I had the last of my AC chemo and now I start my Taxol for 12 weeks, then I go on Femara for 5 years. This time the AC made me extremely tired the same day I had it. I was in bed by 7:30 and slept until 2 A.M. Of course I am on the decadron for 4 days and the emend for 3 days to prevent nausea. I took a compazine tonight because I was a little nauseous not much but they say to take it to prevent it getting any worse so I did.

Tiger and family were suppose to come over for spring break but the car had plans of its own. The green giant decided it was time for a little coddling and some attention for itself and pulled a sneak attack by breaking down. Sure hope they have it back by now. Missed having the kids over but I will be seeing them soon.

Worked all week except for Tuesday which I took off due to a very light schedule. We only had 8 patients. It is nice to have an extra day off. I'm thinking about going on 10 hour days just to get the extra day off each week. Will have to wait until I am finished with chemo to do it. My chemo will be every Wednesday for 11 weeks and then Thursday July 5th will be my last IV chemo. The next step will be the breast reconstruction but not sure when I will start that process.

No big plans for the week end, just the usual stuff around the house.

Have a super week end and a great big hello and love to all.

What If

What if this was your last day? What would you do ? Life is short. Enjoy your time with family and friends. Don't hold grudges. Be happy !!! When I heard about Mrs. Edwards and the return of her cancer it scared me. How do I know my cancer is gone?
I am afraid but I am hopeful. I have so much more I want to do. I want to live. I want to travel. I want to have fun. I want to not be so short of breath.

My greatest joy in life is my family. They are each so precious to me. They are unique individuals and so special in different ways. As I sit here thinking of them I cry and just pray I will be around for years to come to see how they each develop.
Learn, grow and always be there for each other. Above all remember how much I love each one of you.

Looking forward to seeing my kids soon.

More Chemo

Well I thought I only had one more chemo and then I was done but I was dead wrong.
I will need 12 more treatments, one a week for 12 weeks and then a pill every day for 5 years. Oh man and just when I saw the light at the end of the tunnel. I can do this. I will survive. I will be bald forever !!! Who cares ? I love the new me.

The good news is my youngest son will be home in 2 weeks for a visit and I just saw my oldest son and his family and had a super time with them.

Planning on going out to dinner with a bunch of friends tonight. One of my friends will be picking me up and bringing me home. Everyone is being so good to me and they are supporting me 100 %.

Please keep me in your prayers because I need all the help I can get and I do appreciate all the kind thoughts and prayers.

Love to all !

Chemo #3

Well I had my 3rd treatment on Thurs. March 8th and drove myself home for the first time. No problems. Went to work Friday morning, left and came down to visit family in Indialantic. I went to Texas Roadhouse for lunch with Tiger. H saw my head for the first time and didnt seem too shocked. My daughter in law then came home from work and commented on my "nice shaped" head. Tiger went to pick up Charles and when he got home he said I looked "pretty cool". I took a short nap and we had B.L.T's for dinner. I went to bed about 9pm because I was very tired.

Today I got up at 4am, read a little, took medicine and ate a small breakfast. I wasnt feeling well so I took a Compazine for nausea. Charlene woke up, I felt better and we went to a rummage sale and several garage sales to find some goodies. Later, Tiger detailed my car while Charlene, Charles and I went to Friendlys for a very good lunch.

We brought Charles home and then Charlene and I headed off to get a wonderful pedicure and go to the store for dinner fixins. We got taco stuff and headed home for another nap while Charlene cooked dinner.

I woke up and we found a (unbelievably close) wig shop. I found just what I was looking for and it is really comfortable!!

HAVING A WONDERFUL WEEKEND!!! Heading home tomorrow.

Boring Week End

Well I did absolutely nothing all week end. My oldest son was suppose to call Saturday morning to let me know if they could come over or not. Guess his phone must be out of order because I still have not heard from him.

I got a little depressed Saturday afternoon and was wondering what life holds for me in the future. Is the cancer really gone? Is my heart really damaged? Will I stay short of breath for the rest of my life ? What should I do ? What can I do ? I literally have no energy to do anything. Will it get better ? I cook dinner and I can't seem to do much else after working all day. Oh well I must keep trying.

Got Zoe groomed Friday and she smells so much better and looks better. Her grooming cost $36 plus tip. I really should learn to groom her but nah not me.

Plan on going out to dinner tonight. Just because Steak and Ale has Prime Rib for $10.99 and I do love Prime Rib. At least I don't have to cook.

Have a great day !!!!

Side Effects

Well do you remember the old way of thinking of chemo ? Look bad, loose weight, vomiting, nausea, hair loss. Well I only have one of these and it is hair loss. I must say I am a very pretty bald lady (LOL). At least not ugly I hope. Everyone says I have a very nice shaped head. As far as the weight loss goes, well I have gained instead due to the steroids I take to help the treatment. So all the weight I lost is back almost. I think I would rather gain weight than all the other stuff.

I am slowly learning how to live without Mom being with me. I miss her so much and we had so many good times together. Shopping and going out to eat was fun. Still have a lot to do to notify people of her death because I just have not wanted to do all that but I will soon.

Love to all.

Chemo # 2

Well I had my second treatment yesterday and it went very well, no side effects. I had my head shaved on Tuesday because it was falling out everywhere and I just did not want it in my food. My oldest son told me to look on the bright side, at least mine will come back and his won't. Unfortunately both my sons took the bald gene from my side of the family. They also got the looking good gene from my side of the family so it ain't all bad.

Spent last week end with Tiger and family and had a super time. Just relaxed, went shopping, out to eat, pedicure and did some reading. Just a fun time. Thanks for letting me visit.

It has been almost a month since Mom died but it seems like it has been much longer I guess because she had been sick for such a long time. I still look for her at the kitchen table and in her room. I gave all her clothes to a friend who is having a garage sale at her house next week end and the proceeds go to the cancer society for breast cancer.

My brother came over to check and make sure I was ok last night. He has been working in Daytona all week. He has been walking every night to get in shape for the wedding coming up next month.

Blog you all again soon.

Major Melt Down

Well guys it finally hit me yesterday afternoon. My Mom is gone and I mean really gone. I knew this of course but it really hit me yesterday. I don't know if she forgave me or not for putting her in a nursing home and I feel like I should have done more to keep her at home. I can't talk to her and see if she is mad or just to say I love you and miss you more than I can convey with words. I hope she is happy where she is now and enjoying being with family and friends that went before her. Give some of them hell for what they did and give some of them love from here to there.

All I can say is that my friends here at work are super supportive and so very good to me. They talked to me yesterday at my lowest and helped me to just let my feelings out.

Christie and Kai came by to see us and spent a couple of hours visiting. Kai even had supper with us. He has a very healthy appetite. Christie did not know that Mom had died, I thought sure she did but I goofed.

I still love my new SUV. I feel like queen of the road.

LOVE, LAUGHTER, AND HEALTH TO ALL !!!

Banquet

Went to the awards banquet last night with some of my friends. We really had a very nice time.
Dinner was a deluctable salad, chicken marsala with portabella mushrooms, crabmeat stuffed jumbo shrimp, risotto, and broccollini and carrotts. Dessert was vanilla cheesecake with dark chocolate drizzle and shaved chocolate, really yummy.
The entertainment was an Elvis impersonator who was very good except for the movements but none the less enjoyable. Got home around 10:45 p.m. Fine time was had by all in my group.

Having a small side effect from chemo this morning, nothing serious just very jittery, shaking all over and inside but I will get along ok. Thinking about taking med they gave me for this but want to see how long and how bad it could be so will decide later what to do.

Might go and look at cars today. Need to decide very soon. Wish me luck on the search.

If you are reading this let me know so I will know if I should continue to blog.

Bye for now!

Chemo #1

Well it is over. I had my first chemo and so far everything is fine. I sailed through the session with no problems. My good friend Betty stayed with me and we talked the whole time and took a walk and just enjoyed being together. We have to bring cards next time.

Going to my awards banquet tonight with some of my friends. Hope some of my evening clothes will still fit. Oh well I guess I could go in my scrubs (haha).

Keep praying for a smooth trip with the chemo, so many of my prayers have been answered so keep them coming.

Love to all !!

I Am An Orphan

Well the fight is over. Mom died yesterday, she fought a long battle with cancer but it is over. She has gone to a better place and no longer has to struggle to swallow and now the pain has stopped. We will all miss her but she will remain in our hearts.

Today is the first day of my life as an orphan. I have no Father or Mother. How can that be? How do you live without parents? I know you can but why? So many questions but no answers.
Maybe Mom was waiting for me to turn 59 to leave, who knows? Maybe she did not want to see me go through chemo.

My Mother was a (is) a shining star. She loved life and she loved her family. Fly with the doves, tell all the family hello and give some of them hell for what they did, (you know who I mean).
Especially give my love to Daddy and tell him how much I still miss him.

SOAR LIKE AN EAGLE BE FREE LAUGH AGAIN

All my love Mom
Annette

Chemo

Well next week I start chemo. I will be having 4 treatments. I decided not to do the clinical trial. There is just not enough known about the outcome and I decided to do what they do know about. I am anxious to start and I am also afraid to start. Will I get sick, will I soon be bald? The hair will grow back but I am concerned about my eye lashes and eyebrows, but whatever happens I will deal with it and go forward with my life. I just thank God that I have a future.
Everyone keep praying for recovery and all the people who still have need for prayers.
I will not be able to eat any raw vegetables or fruits for a period during my chemo and I sure will miss salads, tomatoes, grapes, cucumbers, etc. I will also miss my medium rare steak but that will only last until the middle of April and I can manage for that long.

My Mother is still going down hill, they are going to have to give her liquid meds or maybe crush her meds and put in applesauce. The cancer is growing and she is having trouble swallowing.
She is still mad at me for putting her in a nursing home but I know deep down she understands.
There seems to be more confusion and then she is perfectly clear. Life is strange but I have always heard that God works in mysterious ways.

Keep praying that I will get through chemo and make the right decisions for family and myself.

Have a great weekend. Love to all.

Welcome 2007

Hope you guys have missed me. Well as you know by now I had to have more surgery on Dec. 15th, the good news was that none of the nodes taken out had cancer but this surgery was more painful than the mastectomy. I am doing fine and I returned to work Jan. 8th. The week was tiring but I survived.

My (2) sons and grandson were very helpful with Granny over the holidays. I just want you to know how much I appreciated all the help. We had to put her in a nursing home on Jan. 8th and she is still mad at me. She does not understand why she cannot be at home but we just could not take care of her and meet all her needs. When she got to the point where she could not get up and walk we had no choice, she was just too weak to do anything but smoke.

I see my doctors today to get my schedule for chemo (Dr. Shah) and post-op (Dr. Arnold). Maybe by this summer all my treatments will be over and life can get back to normal for the McDougall family.

Thanks for all my wonderful gifts at Christmas but the best gift was having all my family with me.

Today is my birthday and I am 59 years young and I am looking forward to a great day and many more to come. Love to all my fans (haha).